Yeah.....We Suck

The United States is one of only five countries that does not provide or require employers to provide some form of paid maternity leave, placing it behind a majority of the world when it comes to instituting family-oriented job policies, according to a new study. In a study from McGill University's Institute for Health and Social Policy , the United States, Lesotho [where?], Liberia, Swaziland [is this one for real?], and Papua New Guinea were the only countries out of 173 studied that didn't guarantee any paid leave for mothers. Among the 168 countries that do, 98 offer 14 or more weeks of paid leave.

Overall, the study's other major findings indicate that workplace policies in the United States for families — such as paid sick days and support for breast-feeding — are weaker than those in all high-income countries as well as many middle and low-income countries.

"More countries are providing the workplace protections that millions of Americans can only dream of," Jody Heymann, director of McGill's Institute for Health and Social Policy, who led study, said in a statement. At least 145 countries provide paid sick days for short- and long-term illnesses, with 127 countries providing for a week or more every year, the study found. In addition, 137 countries require its employers to provide paid annual leave, whereas the Unites States does not guarantee any sort of paid leave. Under the Family and Medical Leave Act of 1993 , U.S. workers are allowed to take up to 12 weeks leave for to tend to family or medical needs, but their absence is unpaid.

States are beginning to take more of an initiative on this front, human-resources experts say. For example, California has passed legislation for paid family leave — called the State Disability Insurance Program , which entitles employees a maximum of six weeks of partial pay per year to care for a newborn or other family matters. While U.S. companies are moving in the way of providing more family-friendly workplace policies, many currently provide alternative forms of payment through their short-term disability programs. For example, having a baby can be considered a qualifying condition for getting paid disability leave.

The release of the study was appropriately timed with discussions in Washington over whether to consider new legislation that would enforce paid leaves. On Feb. 1, Sen. Chris Dodd, D-Conn., who authored the Family and Medical Leave Act, proposed new legislation that would expand the act by providing at least six weeks of paid leave for workers. "Besides our nation's families, our nation's economy, its production, and its competitiveness are threatened when families are forced to choose between the job they need and the family they love," Dodd said in a statement announcing the legislation. "FMLA was a milestone in our nation's dialogue, acknowledging that families, workforce production and competitiveness are not mutually exclusive." [Amen to that!]

The United States also lags behind in protecting working women's right to breastfeed. At least 107 countries grant women the right to breastfeed, and in 73 of those countries, the breaks are paid, the study found. The United States does not have any protections in place for women who want to breastfeed.

[I was told, when I starting working after having the Bruzer, that I could pump in the BATHROOM! I had been using the conference room with no problems for over a month, until the pseudo-HR lady saw me coming out of there with my bag!]

The only area where U.S. job policies were more favorable compared to other countries was in regard to guaranteeing higher pay for overtime work and non-discriminatory hiring policies, researchers found. "The U.S. has been a proud leader in adopting law that provide for equal opportunity in the workplace, but our work/family protections are among the worst," Heymann said. "It's time for a change."

And Then It Hit Me...

I almost DIED in 2005!

If you know me in the "real world", then you have probably heard my laparascopic cholesystectomy story.

What???

What you just read was the actual medical terminology for my gall bladder removal surgery. Cool huh?

Okay, so the story? I'll give you the cliff notes version.

After several weeks of misery (and what I thought was a heart attack), I was finally diagnosed as having gall stones and scheduled surgery. I was very excited about it, and drove myself to the surgical center that Friday morning for a 9a procedure. The doctor told me in our consultation that I would be put out, the gall bladder would be completely removed by laparascopic means, then I would likely go home the next day. In comes the anesthesiologist and she does her thing, takes my weight and asks me questions. Everything is going just fine. Then it's lights out.

Why in the hell did I wake up in the ICU?!

Because I ended up with pulmonary edema, and 'that woman' (see anesthesiologist, above) tried to kill me!!!

No, I am not being dramatic. She took my weight, but instead of using that to determine my dosage, she looked at how big I looked laying down in the bed! Have you ever seen your child sleeping and thought, "Oh, he/she looks so big"? That's pretty much what she did...and she was wrong. Almost DEAD WRONG as a matter of fact.

Because of the pulmonary edema (fluid in my lungs), I was assigned a pulmologist. Thank God! With my estimated 1 hour procedure long behind me, he couldn't figure out why it was 4 in the afternoon....and I still wasn't awake yet!!! So after demanding 'that woman' to tell him what she gave me or come back to hospital and fix it herself, he gave a shot into my IV and I was awake within 20 minutes. My mother did not share that with me until about a week later. I sat up and realized that I almost missed my baby's 1st birthday - and ALL of their birthdays from then on - and I totally LOST IT!

So, I was watching Bones this evening. Very awesome show on Fox, Tuesdays at 7p starring David Boreanz (of the "Buffy" and "Angel" series). Something happened, and the medical examiner ended up with edema due to poisoning. When I heard them say she was basically drowning, I thought about what happened to me. That's when the waterworks began anew.

In my defense, I am PMS-ing. But seriously, one simple surgery almost killed me TWO different ways???? What are the odds, really? My God loves me so!!

Thank You Heavenly Father, I know I have a purpose now!

I Am Still Here!!

Yes, I am still here! It has been VERY difficult as of late for me. I have been in a little hole, only surfacing for work and my motherly responsibilities.

But I am much better now. Thanks to all of those that were concerned enough to NOT check on me! J (oh yeah, I’m back)

For the past week, I have had a headache. Yesterday was my first day without one. No, not the I-don’t-wanna-have-sex kind of headache. But a serious headache. Not quite my usual migraine, but just enough under that to let me know my blood pressure was WAY out of whack. I never took my BP during that time, but I’m sure if I went to the doctor, they would have admitted me into the hospital because I was in danger of a stroke!

Yeah, it was that bad.

But then, just when I thought I couldn’t take another weight, the blessings came! Oh, but GOD!!! Take me as an example of the saying that God will not put more on you than you can bear! I was literally at my breaking point, things were that bad. But, after having my van repo’d for the second time in less than 2 months, things finally took a turn for the better. My mother stepped in, and by the grace of God her credit union agreed to buy my van from the car place I got the van from.

YES. MY MOTHER DOES TOTALLY ROCK!!!!!!!!

Then my landlords reduced my rent by $50. I’m telling you what….the power of God is unstoppable! I’m not nearly out of the woods yet, but I can see the clearing coming up ahead. Plus, I am still ferverently trying to find more work-at-home options to provide a steady income monthly. I think I have found it…and I will keep you posted.

So, even when people come to me CRAZY like I have done something wrong to them purposely, that is not my intention. (You will know if it is)

I have just simply been trying to maintain my sanity for the sake of my family! Give me a break…sheeeeez!

What A Doll!

Cody makes some gorgeous kids! I wish I had a picture of his first daughter, always known to me as Jazzy. Her mother was (as we say in the 'hood) "to'e up from the flo up"! But what a pretty little girl she was. Thank goodness she took after her dad!

Yeah, uh-huh, I'm mean. Whatever! What's your point? (solo-mommy smirks)

Fast forward a whole lotta years to his newest daughter, Taylor. Just as cute. Got to really see the mother last night on some video footage he shot. My only words for him were, "Why do you seem to find the most hoodrat chicks you can to have babies by?!" As he explains it, the boobs got him! Boy did they ever!

Anyway, here's they're cutey, Little Miss Taylor:

Granted, she's 13 months now (and still cute). But if you can be that cute as a newbie, it's gotta be all uphill from there!

Case in point: Here's another very adorable little baby that Cody and I could have easily made together back in the day:

And this is what she looks like at 4 years old:

She's a little crispy from the summer sun but, even on a bad hair day, she's gorgeous! It really is exhausting being so cute all the time. Trust me, I know!!!!

Salon Day

It was L-O-N-G overdue, but I finally did the girls' hair! Here are the results:

I flat-ironed Starr's (the gorgeous chocolate drop) hair and just styled Champagne's. Starr's looks like it was relaxed, and Champagne's is still a little drawn up, which is why it looks so short.

They're just too cute, aren't they? :)

Hanging On By A Thread

I just sit here and wonder is it ever going to end?
Will I always be waiting for my blessing around the bend?
Am I ever going to be totally debt-free?
WIll I ever truly find someone for me?

When will I be able to relax and take a breath?
The way it seems now, that won't be until my death.
Where is the happy ending I hear people talk about?
Whether that really exists is what I am starting to doubt.

I look at my bank account and see red, not black.
Wondering will I ever be able to take up the slack.
I take two steps forward, and get knocked five steps back.
Lord, please help me get my life back on track!

I am at my wits' end and don't know how much longer I can hold on.
But I put on a brave front and try to be strong.
Meanwhile i pray and think of new ways
To pay off my debts and make better days!

If this sounds familiar to you, pray.
If it doesn't sound familiar to, pray you can never relate.
If you can relate to this but it's not happening to you, Pray for Me!!

The Most Awesomest Thing I've Seen in a While

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ervaMPt4Ha0

This totally made me cry. Please watch it, and pass the link to everyone you know.

God Bless Our Soldiers! I may not agree with the war that Bush started, but I support our Soldiers 100%. I believe the Iraqi people deserve help too. I just wish Bush wouldn't have been such an ASS and alienated the whole world from helping us help the Iraqi people.
God Bless our Soldiers' families at home.

I Am Not There Yet...But I'm On My Way!!!

Yes, I am still here! It's been a heck of a week. The ups and downs...mostly the downs. I am still a couple of paychecks behind. I got my 'Kids can't come back to daycare until the entire bill is paid' letter. So that means I get to choose between rent, utilities, or childcare.

Aren't you jealous you're not me???

I still haven't made my decision yet...but Monday is fast approaching. Most likely since I don't have another option for daycare, I will pay the daycare bill. But what I can't get them to understand is when I do that, everything else in my life suffers. But they don't seem to care. With the little note the daycare director wrote to me on Thursday, she should be thanking her lucky stars I don't slash her tires! Yes, I am well aware I owe the money. Yes, I am well aware that it is late. No, that does not give you the right to talk to me like I am your child. No, it does not authorize to presume you know what's going on in my life.

I have been thinking and planning lately about being able to work from home full-time, without giving up a weekend. That is what I would have to do to work at home with my current company. That's not really an option. I am praying and believing that I found my solution though. I should have more information soon on that. I am believing God for that desire of my heart. Which will get me one step closer to owning my own business from home.

This is going to sound silly but, I watched Shall We Dance last night. You know, the one with Jennifer Lopez and Richard Gere? I like that movie, it's really cute. But, there was a scene watching her dance with this dancer's shirt and some tap pants on? I saw a great body, and that's what I want. I know, I know....VERY ambitious. But, even if it takes me a year to get to it, so be it. I am worth my dreams.

WE ARE ALL WORTH OUR DREAMS.


If you get a chance, and you haven't done so already, see The Astronaut Farmer. That movie is so worth it, and it is definite;y one to watch with the family. It is the most perfect movie today about NOT giving up on your dreams...No Matter What.