Saturday, The "Lazy" Day

So, I decided to stay in today and rest...well sort of. My energy isn't up to full strength yet, but I still have laundry to do and a house to clean. Unlike others, this does not mark the start of a 4 day weekend for me. I work all day on New Year's Eve and half a day on January 1st.
The good thing, is I don't plan to ever do it again...unless I am working for myself.

Starr went with my sister Leigh to the mall, and she just called to say she'd be spending the night. I talked to DJ tonight too, he called. Not holding any ill will towards his father, I'm actually annoyed that I let him get under my skin at all. He is delusional, and has been for years now...why am I surprised?

Been talking and chatting most of the day with the bff. Neither of us are physical 100% these past few days, but I think mentally we are stronger than we have been in a while. She doesn't even know it, but she is really an inspiration for me. She is one of the most uplifting, positive influences in my life, and has been for quite a while. We keep each other sane, we keep each other motivated at times when our family upbringing is blatantly against who we want to be now. My mom and I butted heads the other day because I made mention of working at home. "Well, don't quit your job" was the first thing out of her mouth. Good lord, give me a break!!! That's why I can't wait to get back on my feet financially, so I will no feel like I have to answer to my family (who have helped me tremendously) on how I make a living. Does it matter to any of them that I am miserable...and time is ticking by? Does it matter that this has been a dream of mine for almost a decade now....and time is ticking by?

In reality, no, it doesn't matter to them. They just want to make sure I get my bills paid, and the only way to do that (in their mind) is to have the "security" of a brick and mortar, go-outside-the-house-and-work kind of job. Well, I say no....and pretty soon dammit, that's all that will matter. Thank God for my bff who truly does understand!

My thoughts on the new year will coming in the next days. Stay tuned!