One Down...

Well, New Man will likely not be mentioned after today. Yeah, it went that well.

I sent the email and got nothing. Then I sent another a few minutes later, asking him what was going on...and tell him I was freaking out not knowing. He replied that he was busy with the kids the night before and that after further research on the matter, he decided he did not want to continue pursuing anything. He said he felt really bad about it. But I replied it was fine and it was nice meeting and chatting with him. I ended with take care, therefore ending any future conversation. I deleted his newly saved number from my cell phone and when I got home, I deleted him from my messenger list.

I completely respect his decision to not want to pursue a relationship with me. If he is not comfortable with it now, he won't be comfortable with it later...and I can't even say what I would do if it was reversed, honestly. But, he didn't leave the door open to even be chatting friends, so I didn't ask. I am not that desperate!

But DAMN, this really hurts. Rejection like this is very difficult to deal with, and while I play hard about it, I have been trying not to cry all afternoon. It's not ME that they don't like. Not my quirky and neurotic and overly dramatic personality. Not my four children. Not that my finances aren't completely together and my credit sucks. None of those things. You don't want me because I am DAMAGED GOODS. I mean hey, why pick the defective one, when there are so many other (read as: BETTER QUALITY) choices out there?

Did I NOT say I was dramatic?! :)

I haven't heard from Dante yet, and that's okay. I wasn't at my desk for email today anyway. I don't know what to expect. But frankly, I'd rather get it over with all at once if it's gonna be bad. If he doesn't wanna hang when he gets here, ok. Let it all sting at one time and then I can get over it. I hope to hear something tonight, but I won't pressure him...that's for sure. One way or another, it's out there...and there's nothing I can do about it. The truth was told at the appropriate time, so I did right. And whatever happens....It Is What It Is!!!!! :)