Well, It's Finally Official

I will be moving - finally - from this house. My lease ends in July, but due to kinda foreseen circumstances, I should be outta here by the end of June.

It's a lot of my fault and a lot of theirs (slumlords), and I'm just happy it is coming to an end...no matter how unpleasant this ending will be. And it will be unpleasant.

Which leaves me to start packing up my entire house. I am also going to try and line up those that will help me move as well. I really don't want my family to have to do too much of anything. Even if I have to pay some teenagers to load and unload, I need this to go as seamless as possible.

I am in the process of searching for a storage unit and man!!! When did they get so expensive?? Needless to say, it's been a while since I rented a storage unit.

In other news, I talked to the New Guy yesterday and I am so on-the-fence at this point. Why? Well, I have been patient by request for several weeks now, while he figures out if this is where he truly wants to be (or something along those lines). Part of it had to do with me revealing my lifelong medical condition to him and him having to debate and decide if it's something he can live with for the duration of our mortal lives. So, I've been patient and quiet and understanding - for WEEKS!! Then to make matters worse, he is now in the process of going through a major upheaval - enough to knock anyone on their arse - for the past couple of weeks. Well, so I'm expected to be even more patient at this point and I know I need to give him the time and space to take care of these very important matters at hand.

But!! ( you didn't think there wouldn't be one, did you?) I feel as if I'm about to explode if I don't tell him how I feel. So, I talked to him yesterday and told him first off that I really missed him and secondly that I don't feel as if he's that interested in me. Well, of course I got the 'Be patient I'm really going through something' shpeel, which was totally valid. But what annoyed me is that he mentioned nothing else about how I felt. Okay I know it's not really important on his mind right now, so I have to rest in the fact that my words are still rattling around in his head and he will address it later.

Meanwhile, I am more vulnerable as time goes on. I have been feeling this way for a while now, and I don't know how much longer I can allow myself to go through this without feeling like an idiot. I mean, we see each other occasionally (like once a week, maybe) which I can deal with. What I can't deal with too much longer is not hearing from him for a few days. Like I mentioned in a previous post, a lot of the time if I don't call him or text him first...I won't hear from him. Honestly, I have started to feel like I am chasing him, and that is a bad thing. A very bad thing. (I'll post about me and chasing men another day) The bottom line is, if I feel like I am chasing him for too much longer, I'm gonna totally back down. If that happens, there's no guarantee he'll be able to woo me back. IF he even wants to.

Yeah I really am wondering.

And, to make matters worse, there is a tiger stalking his prey (me) not too far away...